Reflections from 2012

2012 is done!  What do you have to show for it?  

I am reminded today through several email lists that I should take some time to reflect on failures, accomplishments, shortcomings and victories that have taken place this past year.  Interestingly, a moment's reflection immediately brings to mind thoughts and events from 2012 that could be written about over many pages. I have laughed and loved. I have cried and been angry.   I have seen hurt and experienced healing.   I have been moved to tears of joy by the greatness of humanity as well saddened by its senseless acts.  I have developed new classes and lectures that have hopefully challenged young minds with the lessons of life.  I have invested in relationships that have empowered me and in some that honestly have drained me.  I have been the king of the world just by lifting a tennis ball in the yard with two dogs.   I have led people to Christ and hopefully not distracted others from coming to him.  I have turned 50 and realized that I will never dunk a basketball again on this side of Glory.  I have said goodbye to my Grandmother, lifelong friends, and too many that have passed seemingly way before their time was done.  I have read books that have challenged me and motivated me to be better but none that have been written with as much love that can be found in the simple truth of God's Word.  I have had prayers answered to my desire and others that went totally against what I desired, but they have been answered.  I have caught little fish and have caught bigger ones, but I did not catch enough.  I have made money and spent too much money, but I have whittled down some debt and am paying my bills.  I have Tweeted, re-tweeted, "facebooked", and played Words with Friends.  I have had multiple words over a hundred points and beaten many but can't for the life of me beat Craig McPhail.  I have gained weight, lost weight and now have successfully lowered my blood pressure (as long as I don't think about trying to beat Craig McPhail!). I have cheered in victory and experienced the agony of defeat in both humanity and athletics.  I have seen the richness of a Carolina Blue sky and the destruction of a powerful storm.  I have been forgiven when I thought I was unforgivable.  I have heard "I love you" lots and learned to listen to it better.  I have made new friends and strengthened relationships with old ones.  I have learned Taylor Swift songs by hearing her words over and over coming from short little girls that aren't so short anymore. I have celebrated a daughter graduating from college and another finishing High School.  I have been jealous accomplishments of others but I do rejoice with them, recognizing I have many more victories to come.  I have been reminded that I am a saint, redeemed, loved, and forgiven.  I have learned that I have found favor with God.  Most of all, I have learned that I am alive and I must live in such a way that is rich and full and I have learned that I have not learned enough. Look 2013....I am coming your way!

Happy New Year!!

Adversity

ad·ver·si·ty

   [ad-vur-si-tee]  Show IPA

noun, plural ad·ver·si·ties for 2.

1.

fortune or fate; a condition marked by misfortune,calamity, or distress: A friend will show his or her true colors intimes of adversity.

2.

an adverse  or unfortunate event or circumstance: You will meet many adversities in life.

It has been said that adversity happens.  A more modern translation might say "stuff happens."  A slang translation uses a more descriptive word, "________ happens."  There are things that occur that one just simply cannot control.  In the last few weeks our nation has been rocked by the remnants of a hurricane and other weather events stemming from that storm that have been chaotic and disruptive to lives.  The ordinary flow has changed temporarily for some while for others it has been life-altering.  

Adversity happens in many forms.  Pain.  Sickness.  Death.  Job loss.  Devastation.  Broken relationships. Misunderstandings.  Misfortune.  Even in the midst of this loss, one can easily personalize the adversities that he or she have gone through, perhaps within the past week.  Bottom line, adversity happens!  When it does, what do you do about it?  How do you react? Some shut down.  Some respond in anger.  Others become hardened and others depressed.  How one deals with adversity stems from the very worldview they may possess.  Negative people may blame others and say that is just the way it is while positive people may ask what can I learn through this trial.  

The Bible is full of characters that dealt with adversity.  One character that seems to have more recorded instances of adversity than anyone else is the Apostle Paul.  2 Corinthians 11:23-33 describes some of the adversity he went through.that included beatings, floggings, stonings, being shipwrecked, lost at sea, being in danger from others, being thirsty and hungry, being cold,  sick, going without sleep, and even times where he had no clothing.  The list is exhausting just reading it, it is hard to imagine what it was like to be in just one of those situations let alone being in all of them!  Adversity happened!

So just how did Paul deal with these adversities in his life?  While scripture does not go into detail about each situation and how he dealt with such, there are a few instances where one can gain insight.  In Acts 28:1-

6, one such instance reveals a mindset and perhaps a model of how to deal with adversity.  Paul has just been over 14 days in hurricane like winds in a ship on the sea.  The ship wrecks and the 276  people on board have either swam to shore or floated safely there on the remnants of the destroyed ship.  They are cold. They are wet.   It is raining.  They are able to start a fire and in an effort to keep the fire burning, Paul gathers brushwood to throw it on the fire.  While doing so, a snake comes out of the brush and bites Paul on the hand.  This is not a glancing blow, it is a full-fledged bite to the extent where the snake is literally hanging by its fangs penetrating through the skin of Paul's hand.  Interestingly, there are witnesses to this trauma.  They respond in an interesting way.  They don't rush to the aid of one that has been snake bit, but they immediately go into a mindset of doom and gloom.  They say, "He must be a murder because he escaped the sea and now Justice has not allowed him to live."  Parenthetically, how many times have you ever allowed your adversity or the adversity of others win?  In other words,  how many times have you just said, "Well, adversity happens.  My fate is sealed.  Gloom, despair and agony on me...(remember the song from 'HEE-HAW?')."  By-standers thought Paul was dead.  His eulogy had already been started.  

According to scripture, Paul's next action is simplistic yet it reveals a mindset that is literally life-changing if one can  put it into practice.  Another parenthetical insertion here, the application of scripture is always easier than we allow it to be.  Paul remains calm.  He is matter of fact.  He simply looks at his hand, sees the snake, shakes it off into the fire, and goes on to what is next without suffering ill effects.  

So what can we learn from this?  Here are a few things you can begin right now to deal with adversity in your life:

1.  Recognize that adversity will happen no matter what you do to prevent it.

2.  Because adversity happens (and it will), begin now to develop a mindset  that will help you shake it off by doing the following:

• Realize who is in charge of the big picture through the study, meditation and application of concepts found in Romans 8:28; Genesis 50:20; Isaiah 38:17; Jeremiah 29:11
• Realize who you are through God's viewpoint as revealed in scriptures like Psalm 139:1-18; a study in the book of Ephesians (utilizing the "I AM" statements...more on that later!); John 3:16; Isaiah 9:7

3.  Pray.  Development a mindset of prayer and that literally is shown in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17.

4.  Surround yourself folks that don't "produce ill effects" (1 Corinthians 15:33) or allow poisonous thoughts to enter your mind by changing the way you think (Romans 12:2).

5.  Practice shaking it off by shaking it off.  Literally.  James 1:22.

Adversity happens.  Will you be ready?

De-cluttering to Hear the Still Small Voice

Lately, I have been busy.  In fact, I have been so busy, I have gotten slack in lots of different areas and things have begun to pile up.  I have found myself dealing in clutter.  My dresser at home has been cluttered with my stuff.  My sock drawer has been cluttered.  My desk at work has been cluttered.  My calendar has been cluttered.  Even my Bible was cluttered.  Yep, you know all those notes you take during the sermon and the pictures drawn by your precious children to keep them occupied during the message?  I mean it seemed that everywhere I turned I was dealing with clutter.  So I said to myself, "Self, what is up with all this clutter!"  I am amazed that I even heard myself since everything was so cluttered, but I did!  A real quick evaluation made me realize that I needed to stop and reassess a few things in my life.  I started asking questions immediately, "How did I get to this point? Had I lost anything in all this clutter? Would I be able to find it if I did?"  I evaluated and re-evaluated some things and in just a few moments found that I had once again allowed "stuff" to get in the way of lots of things.  Funny how that happens.  I think that I would learn after all these years, but somehow, I don't.  I find myself laying something to the side thinking that I would deal with it more efficiently later.  That is all well and good until I lay something else on top of it and then I add more and more and more.  Before long, clutter happens.  

Can I get a witness?  Is it just me or have you been there?  I have learned that clutter in one's life just doesn't happen overnight.  It is a process that grows like a bad disease.  It can spread like a cancer over a period of time and before you know, life is "clutterly"consumed.  So what exactly happens when you get caught up in a mess of clutter?  Clutter is defined as "to fill or litter with things in a disorderly manner."  It is interesting that this definition uses the words "fill or litter."  When one gets caught up in a mess of clutter, space is taken up, seemingly important things become trashy, things are misplaced, perhaps opportunities are swallowed up, and time is wasted.  What have I lost or how much time have I wasted because of clutter?  How much more productive could I be if I de-clutter my life?  Spiritually, we can get cluttered as well.  We can get caught up in service, doing ministry and lose sight of the Savior.  We can be so concerned with rituals we forget the need to strive for righteousness.  We can get so busy with dogma we forget about discipleship.  Can you see the picture being painted before our eyes?  It is easy to be tempted by the clutter in our lives.  Scripture reminds us that we are not alone in this mess (1 Cor. 10:13).  However, that does not excuse us from working on it!  Elijah faced lots of clutter in his life.  One example can be seen in 1 Kings 19:10-18.  Here, Elijah even faced clutter that was beyond his control.  However, one characteristic that he displayed was to work through the clutter until he heard the still small voice of a Mighty God.  There is something to be learned here.  First, in the clutter, you cannot hear God speaking.  Therefore, do all you can to make sure that you get beyond the clutter.  Secondly, sometimes the clutter comes from things we cannot control.  However, God will still speak if you wait for Him to do so.  Being focused, setting goals, and a bit of discipline can help in other areas of your life to help de-clutter.  The really cool thing is I am finding that if I am de-cluttering spiritually, the rest will fall in suit!  So take a lesson from the clutter in my life, examine, evaluate, and enter into a plan of action:  DE-CLUTTER!  In fact, I am cutting this short now to go tackle the sock drawer!  

The Talk...A Guide for College Students to Stay True to Their Faith

Think with me for a moment about that person in your life that sometime in the last few months gave you the talk.  No, not that talk. I mean the talk where someone in your life, your pastor or parent or grandparent or Youth Minister or godly friend said to you, “make sure you hold strong to your faith.”  Did you get that talk?  Did you think about how much that person cared about you to give you that talk?  Did you think about the fact that person might have had a very good reason to give you that talk?  Maybe, that person thought about you going off to college where your faith would be challenged.  Maybe that person thought about the decisions in your life that you would have to make over the next few days and weeks that could compromise your beliefs.  Maybe that person knew that you would be challenged perhaps greater than you have ever been challenged before and you would be stretched greater than you have even been stretched before.

The Apostle Paul recognized that in certain academic settings one just may be challenged to go after some ideas that sway from biblical truth. In Colossians chapter 2, Paul mentions this very thing.

Colossians 2:1-7 reads, “I want you to know how much I am struggling for you and for those at Laodicea, and for all who have not met me personally. ² My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, ³ in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. ⁴ I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine-sounding arguments. ⁵ For though I am absent from you in body, I am present with you in spirit and delight to see how orderly you are and how firm your faith in Christ is.

⁶ So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, ⁷ rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.”

^[1]

Paul has a personal interest in those believers in Laodicea.  Other references in scripture show that there could have been a letter to the Laodiceans .  In fact, Colossians 4:16 reads, “After this letter has been read to you, see that it is also read in the church of the Laodiceans and that you in turn read the letter from Laodicea.” ^[2] Some scholars think that this phrase “letter from Laodicea” is referring to our copy of Ephesians which had been delivered to the city.   Another interesting point is that this city is mentioned in another place in scripture.  Remember these verses from Revelation 3:14-16?

 ¹⁴ “To the angel of the church in Laodicea write: These are the words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation. ¹⁵ I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! ¹⁶ So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.^[3]

Paul recognized that this prominent city in Asia was a place that allowed its citizens to believe that they did not need to be dependent upon biblical values or anything else for that matter.  It was a city of prominent trade, a maker of fine black wool, known for self-sufficiency, a center for banking and a hub for ophthalmology, the branch of science that is about the study and care of the eyes.  It was an academic setting that believed in self-sufficiency.  One writer goes so far to say it was so self sufficient that it wouldn’t even accept help of neighboring countries when a major earthquake hit and left it destroyed.  The interesting point here is that this thought process refused to allow for a dependence on a Holy God.  In fact, the Laodiceans basically said, we can do it on our own.

Paul was burdened about those in that area that could be easily influenced by this thought process.  Colossians 2:1 mentions that this was an area that Paul was struggling with the possibilities of what could happen if this thought process was allowed to infiltrate their minds.  Perhaps someone that cares about you also thought that and decided to give you the talk before you came to college.  Many students come to college and they forget about the path which God has called them to go forth on and they turn to areas of thought that lead them to pain and destruction.  I hope that you had someone to care enough about you to give you that talk.  So today I want to reiterate to you the importance of making sure that you focus on what God has called you to be and do and that you are not swayed to follow another form of thought.  In fact, this is your lucky day.  I want to take the rest of this passage and briefly show you a plan to go forward and be successful in this academic setting  and yet stay true to your belief system.  Contrary to popular belief, Christianity is not about rules and regulations. It is about experiencing life to its fullest.  Jesus said in John 10:10 ¹⁰ The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.^[4] The people of Laodecia were convinced that their fullness of life could be found in lies and misappropriations of the truth.  Paul recognized this and thus had a burden for those Christians there.

Paul states in Colossians 2:2, ² My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, ³ in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.

Look at those phrases:  Encouraged in heart, united in love, full riches, complete understanding.  Do those sound like rules and regulations?  Then he adds that he desires those folks to KNOW the Mystery of God.  What is the mystery of God?  Simply put, the Mystery of God refers to an opportunity for you and I as filthy, dirty rags being united to a Holy God because of what Christ has done for us!  And then Paul adds the phrase, “in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.”  Why in the world would Paul say such things?  I am glad you asked!  He answers in the next verse:  ^4” I tell you this so that no one may deceive you by fine-sounding arguments.”  You will be challenged in the way you think and believe.  You will be stretched.  But you will not be broken if you hold strong to these next thoughts that Paul shares in the following verses.  Paul writes, ^{5 “}For though I am absent from you in body, I am present with you in spirit and delight to see how orderly you are and how firm your faith in Christ is.

⁶ So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him, ⁷ rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.”

Stay connected to those that have given you the talk.  They care about you.  They love you.  They desire the very best that God has for you.  Just like Paul, those precious people in your life are present with you in spirit and they will delight in you being disciplined in your work and firm in your faith.

If you have Christ in your life, keep on keeping on.  Don’t stop.  Grow!  But remember your roots.  Remember where you came from and how your belief system was developed.  Remember how roots are strengthened through proper weeding, care, nutrients, and good soil.  Oh the metaphors here!  Stay strong by making sure you are being with good friends not those that pull you down.  Stay strong physically by taking care of yourself by eating properly, getting rest, and being focused.  Remember why you were taught the things you were taught recognizing that your faith will continue to grow and even become stronger and stronger!  Finally, always be thankful.  Every breath you take is a reason to give thanks.  Every friend you make is a reason to give thanks.  Let your thankfulness overflow.  In short, allow God to show you His best because that is what He desires.

It is very easy to become “Laodicea-like” thinking that you can do it on your own.  I want to encourage you to recognize your dependence on the One who made you to grow and blossom. 

---

^[1] The Holy Bible : New International Version. electronic ed. Grand Rapids : Zondervan, 1996, c1984, S. Col 2:1-7

^[2] The Holy Bible : New International Version. electronic ed. Grand Rapids : Zondervan, 1996, c1984, S. Col 4:16

^[3] The Holy Bible : New International Version. electronic ed. Grand Rapids : Zondervan, 1996, c1984, S. Re 3:14-16

^[4] The Holy Bible : New International Version. electronic ed. Grand Rapids : Zondervan, 1996, c1984, S. Jn 10:10

Things Grannie Taught Me

Thursday morning, April 5, 2012 I received the phone call I had been anticipating for many days.  Actually, for many weeks and months I knew this call would come.  After three weeks in ICU and over 96 years of a wonderful life, my Grandmother passed away that morning about 4:00.  My cousin Melissa, who had determined to be her caregiver, friend, and incredible granddaughter was by her side.  Even though we knew it was inevitable, the tears flowed that morning and I am certain in the days to come there will be more.  In her later years, Grannie had a hard time remembering who folks were, but I always remembered who she was!
At her death, I have realized that I have had almost 50 years of learning, of character development, and wisdom stemming from this saintly lady.
Here are some things I have learned from Grannie:
1.  I have learned to laugh!
Grannie loved to tell stories and jokes.  One my favorites was the story about little Susie in class and having a hard time sitting still.  In fact, the teacher even called her out, "Susie, can you not be still?"  Susie replied, "I am sorry teacher, my butt is asleep," to which little Johnny sitting right behind her blurted out, "It sure is Teacher, I have heard snore three times!"
2.  I have learned to be hospitable but firm.
Grannie always wanted to make sure that her guests were well rested and fed.  She always kept things neat and clean.  Even in her latter years, keeping things in order was important to her.  I remember visiting her at Autumn Care, the nursing facility which she lived.  Often when I would visit her she would be in the dining area, sitting at a table in a wheel chair.  One particular time, another lady was sitting at the table with us and kept pulling the table cloth up.  Granny would reach over and pull it down.  The lady would pull it up, and Granny would pull it down again.  After about the third or fourth time, Granny looked at that lady and in anger said, "Just look at the mess you're making!  Shoot a monkey!"  I realized right then, that I just heard my Grandmother come the closest I had ever heard to cussing! 
3.  I have learned to grow flowers, vegetables, and fruits.
Grannie loved her flower gardens.  She and my Grandfather made a great team for 63 years with their flower gardens, fruits and vegetables!
4.  I have learned to store up the harvest for the cold winter ahead and share what I had.
If you spent any time at all at Papa and Granny's house, you knew there would be a time that  we worked in the garden and then a time putting it all away.  Granny would always share the fruits of the harvest.  She never had much, but she always had enough to share.
5.  I have learned to appreciate front porches.
It didn't matter when you came to visit, how cold or hot it was, or how late you left.  Granny always walked out on the porch to see you off. 
6.  I have learned to hug and kiss those you love.
7.  I have learned that it is okay to talk with your mouth full, especially if you are from "Ardell County."
8.  I have learned that there will never be a better coconut cake, a red velvet cake or banana pudding this side of heaven!
9.  I have learned that if WFMX radio was playing really loud in the kitchen and it was still dark outside, breakfast would be ready in just a few minutes!
10.  I have learned that Jesus loves me, that I was prayed for everyday, and that one day I willl see her again because I have placed my trust in this Jesus she told me about!

My Guiding Statement

I recently gave to my Career and Life Planning class an assignment to develop a 2-3 sentence paragraph that could be seen as their guiding statement. The purpose of this assignment was to help these college age students begin a process that would help them ultimately find the best career path possible. The answers were as varied as the students. Some focused on their faith and how that faith would be intertwined with all they were to do career wise. Others focused on wordy statements that had no direction but obviously sounded good. As I read each one, I could not help but ask questions that would challenge the statements. Teachers are supposed to do that, right? After all, employers certainly would ask questions that would challenge one's beliefs to see who would rise to the top in this competitive job market! I sound like an expert don't I? Being the teacher, I am the expert, well at least for this class. The expert does challenge one to think, right? The expert does ask good questions, right? I found myself looking in the mirror envisioning a super hero complete with cape saying with gusto, "I am Expert!" All of the sudden while my head was swelling with this new found "expertitis," I had this incredible,overwhelming feeling. Immediately I began to ask myself just when exactly I became the expert. How did this educated redneck from North Carolina become such a wealth of knowledge? Sure I have two Master's degrees, but my education certainly has been more than a bunch of books on my shelf. In a few months, five to be exact, I will turn 50 years old. Fifty years! I began to think about my own guiding statement. Has my guiding statement changed? Has it been fulfilled? Am I focused and is my guiding statement making a difference? Is it really guiding me? I have come the conclusion after almost 50 years of living on this earth, my guiding statement has theoretically remained the same. The truth of the matter, I have always held to the basic core beliefs since I was old enough to understand the difference between right and wrong. In fact, since I realized my need for Christ at a very young age, in some form or fashion my guiding statement has remained intact. I may have used different words but they have the same meaning. My sentence structure may have even changed and it very well could change again. However, my core of my core is solid! It is indeed a work in progress! What is my guiding statement? Well, I am glad you asked! Here you go:
I am called to love the Lord with all my heart, mind, soul and strength. I am called to serve Him in everything I do in a way that will give Him honor and in a way that He will be glorified. If for whatever reason I am not doing this, I need to revaluate my heart, mind, soul and strength to determine what I have allowed to take His place, turn from it, and return to that which I have been called.
This statement has many parts in it that need to be broken down for further study. I will take the next several blogs to do just that. You will see that everything in my life stems from this statement. My relationships with my wife, family, and friends; my work ethic; my spiritually; my drive; and my total existence are impacted by my guiding statement! Stay tuned and come along this journey with me! Just maybe, it will help as you look at my guiding statement to define and perhaps refine yours! Let me know what you think!

A Walk on the Beach

Christmas Day 2011 provided for me a first.  I had the opportunity to walk with my wife and family on the warm sands of Bonita Beach on the Gulf Coast of Florida.  It was a beautiful day with the temperature in the high 70's and literally not a cloud in the sky.  Walking hand in hand with my wife, my girls following close behind, I literally experienced a peace that I had not felt in a long time.  We enjoyed discovering the bright colored shells and the warmth of the sand.  I was relaxed, thoroughly enjoying the time with my family and found myself counting my blessings.  The stroll continued and then I heard the voice of one of my greatest teachers and one of the greatest theologians I have ever known, my 5-year old daughter Sara.  She simply said, "Hey Daddy, I am walking in your steps!"  Immediately I thought about what I just heard.  The beautiful innocence and trust suddenly became an overwhelming thought.  I wondered exactly where my feet were and the length of my stride.  I thought about the past year when I had worked long hours, had some great success, but also thought about poor decisions that I had made and the time I had not spent with my family.  I thought about failures of trying to do things my way instead of placing all of my trust in the Lord (Proverbs 3:5-6).  I thought about my next step.  Could Sara reach it?  Would she step with excitement or would she ultimately find disappointment in where I have placed my feet?  Would I help light her path or would I lead her to destruction (Psalm 119:11)?  Would I lead her to Holy Ground (Exodus 3:5)? Yes, my daughter is walking my steps, all four of them are (Proverbs 22:6).  I need to choose carefully where I put my feet.  I need to walk in a pace that they can keep up.  I need to show the way.  Most of all however, I need to walk in the direction that honors my Lord not only because He requires my obedience, but because I do have little feet walking in my steps whereever I put my feet.  Borrowing a title from fellow North Carolinian Nicholas Sparks, my Christmas Day walk on the beach was definitely "A Walk to Remember."